Sunday 16 March 2008

The Dreaded Lurgi




Tomorrow morning I have to give a talk to a group of Social Workers. Unfortunately I have been struck down. I'm not sure what it is. Having watched far too much House MD on DVD, I am now thoroughly convinced it is either Lupus, Sarcoidosis or even West Nile Virus, although the nearest I have been to Egypt is watching Death on the Nile on TV. The only real symptoms I have at the moment (as opposed to my neurotic imagined ones) are that I am a bit bunged up and have a very deep raspy voice. I have to concede that it could possibly just be a cold virus, but I am worried by the voice.Now I struggle to find a feminine voice at the best of times but tomorrow I fear my voice will resonate like Barry White singing the bass version of "Old Man River", with a sore throat while standing at the bottom of a deep well! I just imagine when I stand up and boom out "Hello my name is Jenny" I will lose the room straight away and any message I am trying to convey will be lost in the incongruity of my voice and appearance. One option would be to whisper, which is not the ideal way to do public speaking, with only the front row actually hearing me. The last option will be to hold up flash cards in the style of Bob Dylan's "Subterranean Homesick Blues" video, and mime my way through my talk. Still, I can't get out of it, so I am going to rely on a prescription of a good night's sleep and a dose of bravado!

6 comments:

brad said...

Good luck today.

Jenny Harvey said...

Thanks Brad
As you can see its 3.30 am here, so my plan of a good nights sleepp hasn't worked

Anonymous said...

So, how'd it go?

brad said...

Yep?

Jenny Harvey said...

Well I looked at their stoney expressions and figured humour would not help me, so I went for the tactic of talking very fast, and finishing 5 mins early. Therby telling everyone "Look what the Trade Unions can do for you. I've given you a longer break already.

Anonymous said...

Heh heh! Nice one Jen.