The Bourne' Oration

Well Today was my turn to step up to the plate. I was due to speak on the first motion of the day. Motion 19 Violence and Aggression against public sector workers.( Apparently it is a bad thing!!) Anyway I desperately didn't want to strike out, but should I attempt a safe bunt or slog for the home run (strained analogy alert!)

The motion was similar to the one I spoke on in Manchester earlier this year at our Health Conference. This was an altogether bigger affair with twice as many delegates. So last night found me awake till the early hours refining, honing, and eventually ripping up and starting again, my speech. My biggest worry was timing. I had 3 minutes to fill, but must not go over as I would get the red light and be cut short. I needed to rehearse with an audience. So over the speaker phone to Vicky I went through my paces. With a couple of alterations at her suggestion I eventually settled on my script which was scrawled across 8 sheets of tatty note paper.

Waking up in the morning I started fretting about my appearance. To most delegates speaking I'm sure it's not that important. For me however, it was always going to be an issue. I may be the only transgendered woman speaking all week. I wanted to give the best impression I could. I settled on my full black linen skirt with a pattern of white circles round the hem (it is nicer than it sounds) and a new white top with a lace panel round the neckline(ditto). However I ran into a bra paradox. I had two bras with me. My favourite black one which made the most of my boobs, and a white one which was a bit large for me. The black one was clearly a fashion disaster cliche, worn under a white top. The white one just didn't cut the mustard in boob shapeage. The solution: wear both. The black one for shape and the white over the top for camouflage. So for this day I was to be Jenny Two Bras.

I got to my seat in the hall early. My motion was to be first up, but prior to that would be opening addresses and some complicated standing orders wrangling. After what seemed like an age while I silently went through my lines as conference proceeded, it was the turn for Motion 19. Thanks to some helpful colleagues from our region, I was scheduled to speak third up. If you are far down the queue there is a danger that someone will call for the vote and your chance to speak is lost. The chair of conference nodded and smiled at me and up I went. I stood for a few seconds as the rostrum rose to the right height for the microphones. I looked up and all I could see were swathes of faces peering back at me, sweeping right up to the far back of the room. There were so many people to see that they almost merged into a glutenous wodge of trade unionism. Once into my stride my speech was over so quickly. It seemed to go down well, though its difficult to tell as generally everyone gets good applause. The positive was that I didn't stumble over my words, knock down the podium or tread on the back of my skirt thereby pulling it down in front of 3000 people, which had been amongst my anxieties.

I have to admit I got a buzz from speaking and now find it hard to see what I was so anxious about. I shall probably start to annoy everyone by speaking on almost everything I can.